- You started making emperor jokes before he was even home from the hospital.
- You bought six of THE blanket--two to use, two to wash, and two just in case. Plus a back-up lovey, three of the favorite cup, and identical potties for each bathroom. Yes, for one child. No, you've never regretted it.
- Forget the cute little pastel sign for the doorknob. Your QUIET--BABY'S SLEEPING sign is in fifteen-inch-high letters on every door of your house. And the last person who rang your doorbell at 2 PM now avoids your entire neighborhood.
- She said "shoes" before "mama."
- You serve dinner in a muffin tin so the foods won't touch.
- You've had to carry him out of an event that hundreds of other small children were quietly enjoying. But that's okay because...
- You've mastered the "sympathetic carry": you can carry a thirty-five pound, kicking, screaming child in a gentle way that affirms that A) you are not going to allow this behavior to go on here, and not giving in to a tantrum, yet B) you are neither kidnapping the child nor dragging him out to the car for a beating.
- You wonder if preschool is worth the drama, even after months.
- You have read every parenting book published in your lifetime.
- You never, EVER stir the yogurt.
Tuesday, January 10, 2012
Signs You Have a High-Maintenance Child
You might have a high-maintenance child if...